Title: Losing You
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa Vance, Steve Hayden
Prompt: 082. If.
Word count: 2101
Rating: G (K)
Summary: After the events of “Dead Offerings”, Tessa gathers a bit of courage to say what’s on her mind.
Author's Note: This is just one of the many drabbles and one-shots I have sitting on my computer. Normally I think "hey, I could do a long story on this!", but then I never get around to it and it simply sits there on my harddrive, never being published. So this is one of the many short scenes I'll be uploading in the future as I clear them up a bit.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
LOSING YOU
“You know what?” she asked him with a little tilt to her head, making her curls bob back and forth above her slender shoulder. Her big blue eyes were hesitant as they met his. “I’m scared.”
“What of?” For some reason his neck tensed and something strange coiled in his stomach. He didn’t linger on it, though, too mesmerised and trapped in the beautiful features framed by unruly blonde locks, too intent on keeping his distance.
She sighed then as if some sort of monstrous obstacle had been blown to pieces and left her with free passage, yet still she was apprehensive of journeying down the road presented to her. He wondered, but remained silent, waiting.
“Losing you,” she said in the end, withdrawing her gaze and fixing it on the pool table where their redheaded friend was being outmatched and seduced by a fellow constable from Forensic Services that had recently joined the forensic team. Neither of them knew him. Not that it mattered at the moment. He was too busy making sure his head didn’t snap in a sudden turn towards his companion.
Had she said that? He wasn’t really sure until he saw she was starting to chew her lower lip uncertainly, slowly crossing her arms defensively. Preparing herself for which assault? Did she think so lowly of him? Is that the impression he had given in their years of friendship?
When he thought about it, maybe he had. Sort of. They’d had a rough start but things settled down after a while, and now he couldn’t honestly say he hated her or something like that.
But he had never actually told her that. He knew what women were like. They needed affirmation and reassurance, but he had never ventured down that road. Why’s that?
Because that would mean she wasn’t just a partner any longer. It was easy to assume things were understood when not spoken of, that they could keep up the pretence of having a good and healthy working relationship. It’s not like he needed to tell old Barney that he liked him every fortnight or so.
But Tessa was a woman. Therein lay the difference. Despite popular beliefs on females being just like men, science proved again and again that men and women were polar opposites. Sure they had things in common, like a decent sensibility, but none had an equal amount of anything. Like two men were different, so were two women. Based on his experiences, it was a logical conclusion to say Barney and Tessa were completely different personalities. And he should have remembered that. Whereas he didn’t need to broadcast his feelings for Barney, Tessa was a whole other matter.
So why hadn’t he told her?
Steve knew why. It was perfect clear. But it was something he had tucked away in his mind for so long he had been sure it would never come up. Until now when he was faced with a beautiful and defensive friend that somehow managed to relay a deeper meaning to her statement than Steve would ordinarily catch up on. Perhaps it was the state of mind after a traumatic incident when they almost lost Tootsie to a serial killer, or the atmosphere born from watching Dee move in for the big kill beside the pool table, teasing and grinning as her recipient responded favourably.
And yet he couldn’t tell Tessa any of that. To her he was the big analytical and logical mind that had trouble working outside the parameters of imagination, and who had always kept things on the surface, never venturing below to the bottomless depths, letting her take first approach. So he would have to act accordingly.
“You’re not gonna lose me,” Steve said off-handed, slinging his shoulder seemingly carelessly over the back of the chair, fingering with the half-filled glass of beer in front of him. He grinned for her benefit when she looked back at him, lower lip red from the self-inflicted biting. “I’m not that easy to kill off, haven’t you noticed? Us Homicide detectives have at least nine lives, though I think you’re pushing up on twenty-something.”
Tessa’s lips widened in a smile at the familiar teasing, but she didn’t hold his glance for long as she withdrew and leaned forward on her elbows, sighing again as Dee and her unnamed companion leant close enough to touch but kept to the game.
Steve felt his insides melt at the nearly mournful look that crossed his partner’s face and wished he’d had more balls. Had it been someone else, someone less beautiful and endearing even in sorrow, he would have made a go at her. As it was, he forced his hands to remain calm and schooled his features.
“Do you think Fisk’s with her?” Tessa asked suddenly from the bottom of her water glass, only glancing at him briefly, chewing her lip again. Steve shrugged.
“Don’t know. Probably.”
He knew what she was truly doing. She was gathering courage. Something he seemed to lack in his little self-imposed world of Cold-hearted Bastard. She had always been the bravest of the two of them. The emotional, the driven, the obsessed; Tessa was the visible force of nature’s most fundamental phenomenon. Steve carried it all inside, making him the invisible, the one who hid behind logic and mathematical concepts. Things he could grasp with his head, not his heart.
“She’ll be all right,” Steve told her softly, meeting her eyes when she looked up at him from her glass. He struggled to keep his hands where they were. “Unless Fisk bores her to death.”
“He won’t,” Tessa replied certainly. “They have something special.”
As she drifted off, Steve observed how her eyes glazed over and wondered not for the first time what she was envisioning in front of her. Was it Fisk hugging Tootsie tightly in the morgue after the killed had been taken down? Or a vision that had never happened but which she wanted to come true?
Steve didn’t know whether he should take the opportunity she presented him with or keep to the routines he had kept religiously for three years. His stomach coiled again when faced with this dilemma and he chose ashamedly the usual way out.
He kept silent.
The pub supplied the sounds neither of them elicited. Music pulsated in the ground, making the chairs they sat on vibrate. A television set in the back broadcasted loudly a sports event Steve took no pleasure from watching. Laughter and off-duty talk from the thirty-odd coppers and civilians surrounding them really only made him wish for a quieter atmosphere when previously he would have managed to unwind because of it.
It was strange but all Steve felt like doing wasn’t gulping down a couple of beers while chatting amiably with his friends and get all the ugly pictures and emotions out of his mind. He wanted to continue the train of thought Tessa had started earlier. He wanted her to keep talking because listening to her gentle voice trusting him with her thoughts made him relax. And he felt sort of special.
‘Ain’t that an eye-opener,’ his mind rebuffed ironically.
Steve agreed.
He looked back at the blonde curly bob, strands of hair sticking out where she had run her hands through it, messing it up. Coupled with the slightly creased brown trouser suit and open jacket revealing a creamy, silken shirt, it was a vision that made his stomach coil even more. It was unbelievable he had lasted all these years without doing anything.
“Why are you so scared of losing me?” Steve asked bluntly, deciding beating around the bush any longer would only prolong the conversation and most likely end up with no answer at all when their sensible minds deemed it ready to head home. His eyes settled upon her beautiful features that flashed with surprise before starting to chew her lip profusely again, not quite meeting his stare.
“Because...” Tessa began slowly, hands wrapped around the empty water glass until her knuckles whitened. He noted the slightly quiver in her voice and once more felt his neck tense from the strain of keeping his hands to himself.
“You’re my best friend. You make me feel safe,” Tessa continued in a low mumble that shook hesitantly. She glanced up at him, giving him a sort of sad smile Steve loathed to see on her face. Like there was no light left in the world. “And you’re everything a girl could hope for.”
She left the statement hanging, withdrawing from him once more as her hands abandoned the water glass, settling onto the opposite elbow joint in the now familiar defensive gesture. Off by the pool table, Dee and her seductive opponent were beginning to wrap up the game, their innuendo getting clearer for every ball that was downed. It was easy to see where their night was winding up.
But Steve didn’t watch them for long. His eyes were all on his partner and best friend as his heart did an unfamiliar skip and betrayed his carefully kept charade. This time he had heard and understood perfectly what she really meant to say. And yet he was speechless. There were no words that came to his rescue. He was instead drawn to the enigma that continued to surprise him.
Tessa tilted her head, noticed his expression, and then looked away again. Her voice was half a whisper and half a wondering inquiry as she spoke out of sight. “Haven’t you ever wondered what would’ve happened if we hadn’t met as partners that night?”
The Funworld amusement park. Nursery rhyme serial killer that wasn’t as cool-headed as he believed he was. Steve knew what she was referring to. He knew because it was something that had stayed tucked away in the back of his mind for years.
When he didn’t answer, Tessa chuckled darkly, still faced away from him. “I did. I still do. When I’m with you and see how amazing you are, I can’t help but wonder...what if?”
What if Steve had hit on her? What if Tessa had returned the sentiment? What if they had never been partners? There were so many and from the turn of the conversation, Steve could only assume Tessa had thought of them all. Just like him.
“Then again,” Tessa sighed in defeat, “As much as I’d like to initiate things, I’m scared of ruining everything.”
She didn’t ask him about his emotions, she just assumed they were similar to hers. Did she read him that well? Had they known each other so long and so well? Steve hadn’t realised. Tessa truly was the bravest of them both when hinting on this subject and then suddenly revealing everything, drawing him into her entrapment as steadily as she did the suspects.
“I’ve done it before,” Tessa continued without a thought to his inner battle, as if rolling on a tidal wave she couldn’t escape once it had caught her. “With Ezra, with Brett. There was this one guy who managed to stay my friend afterwards, but it didn’t last long once he got back together with his ex. Now they’re all gone and I can’t help wondering: Is there something wrong with me?”
Steve realised her voice broke at the last word and scrutinised her hunched shoulders for any sign of upset, but there wasn’t even a shiver, just silence as Tessa drifted off somewhere out of reach.
He couldn’t help it. His hands began to move in her direction.
But then she turned towards him and he lost the momentary surge of courage, letting the arms fall down before she noticed. A lone tear was tracing the length of her cheek, down her jaw and ending up hanging precariously on the tip of her chin. The sad smile sent towards him turned his insides to mush.
“I’m always falling for my best friends,” Tessa half-whispered, “Yet when my mind’s screaming for me to keep my distance I can’t help but wonder if I’m losing my life’s opportunity not doing anything?”
And in that moment, Steve wondered about that as well.
But he was too much of a coward to do anything. He was the invisible one, the one who made reasonable choices. This was not his territory. He simply did not have the words.
He met Tessa’s beautiful blue eyes, clenching his beer.
“Do you want something stronger than water?”
END
*** I decided to end it here. Creates a bit of mystery, doesn't it?
Viser innlegg med etiketten Murder Call. Vis alle innlegg
Viser innlegg med etiketten Murder Call. Vis alle innlegg
mandag 16. mars 2009
torsdag 14. august 2008
Fic: Calling Daddy
Title: Calling Daddy
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa Vance, Steve Hayden, Original Character
Prompt: 027. Parents
Word Count: 1298
Rating: G (K)
Summary: Despite the hour, some girls just want their daddies. Too bad daddies don’t always understand the problem.
Author’s Note: A small one-shot I did after I’d written “Crazy”. For some reason, those kids are just stuck in my head and I could picture so many scenes involving the little Vance-Hayden family I made up. This story, however, is not set in that particular universe, as Tessa and Steve still work together, and they only have one child.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa Vance, Steve Hayden, Original Character
Prompt: 027. Parents
Word Count: 1298
Rating: G (K)
Summary: Despite the hour, some girls just want their daddies. Too bad daddies don’t always understand the problem.
Author’s Note: A small one-shot I did after I’d written “Crazy”. For some reason, those kids are just stuck in my head and I could picture so many scenes involving the little Vance-Hayden family I made up. This story, however, is not set in that particular universe, as Tessa and Steve still work together, and they only have one child.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
CALLING DADDY
The shrill ring of a phone setting off jerked him out of his sleep with a start. For a second he wondered why the hell he had woken up, before hearing the ringing. He half groaned, half sighed, as he leaned over and flipped on the bedside light before picking up his cell phone. The caller ID already warned him who it was.
“You’ve got this after your mother,” Steve Hayden grumbled into the phone, running a hand across his face to rub the sleep out of his eyes.
“I’m sorry, Dad, I forgot about the time difference. I just. . .” The tender voice at the other end drifted off. Along with insomnia, insecurity ran closely in the family and Steve grimaced. He was becoming a grumpy old bugger.
“No, I’m sorry, Chrissie,” Steve said, his voice softer. He sat up against the headboard as the bed shifted beside him. He lowered his voice when he spoke. “What’s wrong?”
“There’s nothing wrong,” replied Christine Hayden evasively and Steve almost snorted. She seemed to hear it anyway and sighed. “Okay, okay. I ran into some trouble at school and. . .”
“And?” prompted Steve, fighting off the migraine he felt coming – result of the barely two hours of sleep he’d gotten so far, as well as impatience over his daughter’s reluctance to simply admit what she had done this time.
“I’m suspended for two weeks,” finished Christine finally, dropping the bomb he had been waiting for since the first time she called him at night saying she had gotten into some trouble.
“Chrissie. . .” he sighed.
“I know, I know, all right? It’s just—that guy! He’s such a stupid, ridiculous arse! Always hanging on me and fussing things up.”
“What’s going on?” the woman beside him mumbled, also dragging a hand across her eyes, squinting in the light from the bedside lamp. It had been a late night for both of them.
“Your daughter’s been suspended,” muttered Steve off the phone, holding a hand over the receiver.
“Shit! Is Mum awake?” asked Christine frantically. Her hearing was exceptional, there was no doubt about that.
Steve turned back to the phone. “Yeah, she is. Now, Chrissie, didn’t we talk about this? You remember promising me you weren’t going to get into more trouble?” Christine groaned into the phone. “You just can’t go around solving problems that way.”
“Mum did,” Christine defended.
“Well, your Mum’s a wacko case. You can’t follow her example.” Despite the seriousness he tried to put forth, Steve couldn’t help the grin on his face, knowing that no matter what he said, both his girls would stay the way they were. He hoped, however, to lessen the damage somewhat. “Now what’s up with this guy?”
“Steve,” said Tessa Vance-Hayden warningly, turning on the bedside light on her side and propping herself up on one elbow. Not surprisingly, she was already wide-awake.
“Everything’s up with him!” exclaimed Christine on the other end. “He just can’t stop buggering me!”
“Well, did you tell him to stop?” he asked.
Christine snorted, and from the corner of his eye Steve could see Tessa rolling her eyes with a smirk.
“Yeah, Dad, I did. Right before I asked him nicely to join a Tupperware party and read Cosmo.”
Although Steve might be less travelled in the circles of female minds, he did recognise when he was being patronised. Tessa reached over him and took the phone away despite his protests.
“Hi, sweetie, it’s Mum,” greeted Tessa. Steve let out a small huff of annoyance before settling next to his wife with a frown. “Listen to your Dad, okay? No more trouble-hunting.” She gave him a look, saw his expression, and grinned. “Why don’t you and I talk a bit more about this tomorrow? The old grump and I have an early meeting, and you need some rest as well. Love you too, sweetie. Bye.” She hung up and offered him the cell phone with a smirk that made him even more annoyed.
Accepting the phone stonily, Steve put it within easy reach on his nightstand and made to turn off the light when Tessa’s arms snaked around his bare chest.
“Your womanly charms won’t work,” he told her gruffly.
“You’re such a sweetheart,” Tessa teased gently, snuggling closer to his back and never relinquishing her grip. “You absolutely hate the idea she’s moved out, don’t you?”
Steve didn’t reply, instead turning off the light, and was forced to hear Tessa’s wonderful chuckle in his ear. In the darkness it made the sensation of her breath against his nape send a small shiver down his spine.
“Christine’s just growing up, Steve. She’s learning right from wrong in her own way. You’re not making it any easier on her.”
“Maybe,” Steve said inconclusively, finally sighing. “She could’ve chosen some place closer.”
“Says he who moved, what, 200 miles away from home to attend school? You know, Europe happens to be a very friendly place,” said Tessa lightly, making sure he heard the teasing in her voice. “I found it very exciting.”
“Exactly. That’s what I’m afraid of. She’s just like you.”
Tessa sighed heavily, reaching up to stroke his chin lovingly. “Steve. . . Why do you think she called your cell phone?” When he didn’t answer, she continued. “She looks up to you. She wants you to guide her. But that means you can’t push her or intimidate her. Your opinion has always been worth the most to her, even if you can’t always understand what she wants.”
It took several long moments before Steve managed to answer, exhaling noisily first. “I just don’t like her being so far away.”
“I know,” Tessa soothed, nuzzling his neck and resting her head on his shoulder. “But she has to learn to take care of herself, you know, like any nineteen-year-old. You can’t protect her forever. Not even from annoying guys who’s crushing on her.”
“What’d you mean?” asked Steve suddenly, frowning. Tessa chuckled.
“It’s obvious there’s some sort of attraction going on between them. I know Chrissie doesn’t sound like it, but I do believe she enjoys his ‘annoying’ prescence more than she lets on.”
“How do you know?”
“I’m her mother,” Tessa replied obviously, kissing the nape of his neck. “I know these things. And I was just like her when I first met you.”
Steve couldn’t help his features softening slightly. Romance wasn’t his forte, but sometimes his wife could drive him to mush. “You’re still like that, you know. Crazy, obsessed, getting into trouble.”
“Mm,” hummed Tessa, stroking his skin slowly.
“But I guess you’ve matured a bit since then,” said Steve mock-hesitantly, earning him a gentle swat.
“I’d hope so!” Tessa’s eyes twinkled in the dim darkness. “More than twenty years with you and a kid; I’d say I’ve gotten a bit more responsible.”
“In here, perhaps, but not out there,” Steve reminded her with a grin. She was still running across busy streets and entering suspect houses without waiting for backup.
He finally rolled over on his back, drawing his arms around her and pulling her close. He pressed a kiss to her shampoo-scented hair. “I’m glad, though.”
“That I’m still crazy and obsessed?” retorted Tessa in a mumble as she draped a leg across his under the sheets.
Minx, thought Steve with an inward grin as he said, “Yes. That means I still have the highest solve rate by association.”
Tessa laughed, snaking her arms around him langoriously, eyes twinkling. “That’s not the only thing you have by association.”
“That’s right,” Steve murmured, dipping low to kiss her lips. “So. . . You awake yet?”
“More than awake for what you have in mind,” Tessa grinned.
“Reading my mind are you?”
“Always.”
END
The shrill ring of a phone setting off jerked him out of his sleep with a start. For a second he wondered why the hell he had woken up, before hearing the ringing. He half groaned, half sighed, as he leaned over and flipped on the bedside light before picking up his cell phone. The caller ID already warned him who it was.
“You’ve got this after your mother,” Steve Hayden grumbled into the phone, running a hand across his face to rub the sleep out of his eyes.
“I’m sorry, Dad, I forgot about the time difference. I just. . .” The tender voice at the other end drifted off. Along with insomnia, insecurity ran closely in the family and Steve grimaced. He was becoming a grumpy old bugger.
“No, I’m sorry, Chrissie,” Steve said, his voice softer. He sat up against the headboard as the bed shifted beside him. He lowered his voice when he spoke. “What’s wrong?”
“There’s nothing wrong,” replied Christine Hayden evasively and Steve almost snorted. She seemed to hear it anyway and sighed. “Okay, okay. I ran into some trouble at school and. . .”
“And?” prompted Steve, fighting off the migraine he felt coming – result of the barely two hours of sleep he’d gotten so far, as well as impatience over his daughter’s reluctance to simply admit what she had done this time.
“I’m suspended for two weeks,” finished Christine finally, dropping the bomb he had been waiting for since the first time she called him at night saying she had gotten into some trouble.
“Chrissie. . .” he sighed.
“I know, I know, all right? It’s just—that guy! He’s such a stupid, ridiculous arse! Always hanging on me and fussing things up.”
“What’s going on?” the woman beside him mumbled, also dragging a hand across her eyes, squinting in the light from the bedside lamp. It had been a late night for both of them.
“Your daughter’s been suspended,” muttered Steve off the phone, holding a hand over the receiver.
“Shit! Is Mum awake?” asked Christine frantically. Her hearing was exceptional, there was no doubt about that.
Steve turned back to the phone. “Yeah, she is. Now, Chrissie, didn’t we talk about this? You remember promising me you weren’t going to get into more trouble?” Christine groaned into the phone. “You just can’t go around solving problems that way.”
“Mum did,” Christine defended.
“Well, your Mum’s a wacko case. You can’t follow her example.” Despite the seriousness he tried to put forth, Steve couldn’t help the grin on his face, knowing that no matter what he said, both his girls would stay the way they were. He hoped, however, to lessen the damage somewhat. “Now what’s up with this guy?”
“Steve,” said Tessa Vance-Hayden warningly, turning on the bedside light on her side and propping herself up on one elbow. Not surprisingly, she was already wide-awake.
“Everything’s up with him!” exclaimed Christine on the other end. “He just can’t stop buggering me!”
“Well, did you tell him to stop?” he asked.
Christine snorted, and from the corner of his eye Steve could see Tessa rolling her eyes with a smirk.
“Yeah, Dad, I did. Right before I asked him nicely to join a Tupperware party and read Cosmo.”
Although Steve might be less travelled in the circles of female minds, he did recognise when he was being patronised. Tessa reached over him and took the phone away despite his protests.
“Hi, sweetie, it’s Mum,” greeted Tessa. Steve let out a small huff of annoyance before settling next to his wife with a frown. “Listen to your Dad, okay? No more trouble-hunting.” She gave him a look, saw his expression, and grinned. “Why don’t you and I talk a bit more about this tomorrow? The old grump and I have an early meeting, and you need some rest as well. Love you too, sweetie. Bye.” She hung up and offered him the cell phone with a smirk that made him even more annoyed.
Accepting the phone stonily, Steve put it within easy reach on his nightstand and made to turn off the light when Tessa’s arms snaked around his bare chest.
“Your womanly charms won’t work,” he told her gruffly.
“You’re such a sweetheart,” Tessa teased gently, snuggling closer to his back and never relinquishing her grip. “You absolutely hate the idea she’s moved out, don’t you?”
Steve didn’t reply, instead turning off the light, and was forced to hear Tessa’s wonderful chuckle in his ear. In the darkness it made the sensation of her breath against his nape send a small shiver down his spine.
“Christine’s just growing up, Steve. She’s learning right from wrong in her own way. You’re not making it any easier on her.”
“Maybe,” Steve said inconclusively, finally sighing. “She could’ve chosen some place closer.”
“Says he who moved, what, 200 miles away from home to attend school? You know, Europe happens to be a very friendly place,” said Tessa lightly, making sure he heard the teasing in her voice. “I found it very exciting.”
“Exactly. That’s what I’m afraid of. She’s just like you.”
Tessa sighed heavily, reaching up to stroke his chin lovingly. “Steve. . . Why do you think she called your cell phone?” When he didn’t answer, she continued. “She looks up to you. She wants you to guide her. But that means you can’t push her or intimidate her. Your opinion has always been worth the most to her, even if you can’t always understand what she wants.”
It took several long moments before Steve managed to answer, exhaling noisily first. “I just don’t like her being so far away.”
“I know,” Tessa soothed, nuzzling his neck and resting her head on his shoulder. “But she has to learn to take care of herself, you know, like any nineteen-year-old. You can’t protect her forever. Not even from annoying guys who’s crushing on her.”
“What’d you mean?” asked Steve suddenly, frowning. Tessa chuckled.
“It’s obvious there’s some sort of attraction going on between them. I know Chrissie doesn’t sound like it, but I do believe she enjoys his ‘annoying’ prescence more than she lets on.”
“How do you know?”
“I’m her mother,” Tessa replied obviously, kissing the nape of his neck. “I know these things. And I was just like her when I first met you.”
Steve couldn’t help his features softening slightly. Romance wasn’t his forte, but sometimes his wife could drive him to mush. “You’re still like that, you know. Crazy, obsessed, getting into trouble.”
“Mm,” hummed Tessa, stroking his skin slowly.
“But I guess you’ve matured a bit since then,” said Steve mock-hesitantly, earning him a gentle swat.
“I’d hope so!” Tessa’s eyes twinkled in the dim darkness. “More than twenty years with you and a kid; I’d say I’ve gotten a bit more responsible.”
“In here, perhaps, but not out there,” Steve reminded her with a grin. She was still running across busy streets and entering suspect houses without waiting for backup.
He finally rolled over on his back, drawing his arms around her and pulling her close. He pressed a kiss to her shampoo-scented hair. “I’m glad, though.”
“That I’m still crazy and obsessed?” retorted Tessa in a mumble as she draped a leg across his under the sheets.
Minx, thought Steve with an inward grin as he said, “Yes. That means I still have the highest solve rate by association.”
Tessa laughed, snaking her arms around him langoriously, eyes twinkling. “That’s not the only thing you have by association.”
“That’s right,” Steve murmured, dipping low to kiss her lips. “So. . . You awake yet?”
“More than awake for what you have in mind,” Tessa grinned.
“Reading my mind are you?”
“Always.”
END
torsdag 26. juni 2008
Fic: Scent of Comfort
Title: Scent of Comfort
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa Vance, Steve Hayden, Dee Suzeraine, Lance Fisk, Imogen ‘Tootsie’ Soames
Prompt: 036. Smell
Word Count: 2945
Rating: PG (K+)
Summary: After a traumatic experience a friend is in need of comfort.
Author’s Note: Coda to “Scent of Evil” (3x17) SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! Do not read if you do not wish to be spoiled. Also a small mention of Brett, Tessa’s ex-boyfriend from novel Deadline / Suspect by Jennifer Rowe.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
SCENT OF COMFORT
Emma Chambers: They can smell your fear.
Tessa Vance: Open the gate! (Chambers sprays the communicative scent on Tessa) No! (Chambers walks away)
(Steve arrives at the kennel. Chambers meet him in the hallway.)
Emma Chambers: The dogs’ve gone crazy – I can’t control them!
Steve Hayden: Where’s Detective Vance?
Emma Chambers: I’m gonna get help! (Steve is suspicious, runs off in the direction Chambers came from)
Steve Hayden: Tessa! Tessa!
Tessa Vance: (Lying on the ground trying to reach her gun under the fence door) I’m here! Over here, Steve! Open the gate! Get me the gun!
(Steve manage to get her out)
(From 'Scent of Evil', Murder Call, 3x17)
***
Detective Senior Constable Tessa Vance shut the door behind her with a loud click as the deadlock slid in place. For a moment she fingered with the chain, before leaving it hanging limply along the frame of the door. It was a silly notion to lock everything behind her. It would not bring any more comfort or security than she already had.
She turned on a small lamp by the grey couch, ignoring the red blinking light of the answering machine as she threw the handbag on top of the dining table. Shirking out of the high heels, Tessa felt cool surface touch the soles of her feet and fleetingly wondered if she should put some socks on. She never made it into the bedroom, however, as she drifted back towards the couch and slumped heavily into the cushions.
It was as if the smell was still on her even if she couldn’t sense it herself. That fact made it all worse. Not being able to sense the thing that made her a walking target for four-legged beings with snapping jaws...How lucky she had been to know about it rather than be taken by surprise. A very deadly surprise. The thought gave her no comfort either.
Standing up on her feet Tessa made her way into the bathroom, shedding the replacement jacket she had picked up before returning to the office. Following the jacket into the hamper was the white sweater and black pants, then the stockings. The underwear landed on the bathroom floor and the next moment she had hot water streaming down her face and body. With a good handful of soap she started rubbing it in, never bothering to turn the water off in the meantime, scrubbing and scrubbing until she felt hot and prickly all over.
Her chest started heaving as she saw the skin redden and she imagined the blood running all over her stomach and arms... Burning eyes unleashed tears that were swallowed by the hot water splashing on her face. She didn’t care about being careful lest her skin dry up. She didn’t care about washing her hair nurturingly once or twice. All she could see behind closed lids and hear beyond the water clouding her ears was the malicious grin through thin-wired fence and the voice dripping with taunting venom as the dogs growled behind her.
“They can smell your fear.”
Tessa slid down to the floor of the shower, wrapping her arms around her legs as the water still sprayed down on her. It was still there. That scent. She couldn’t shake it off. She couldn’t wash it off. It had ingrained itself into her skin.
Her throat constricted brokenly.
***
Watching the spunky redhead down the last ball, Detective Senior Constable Steve Hayden did the obligatory downcast chin as he acknowledged her victory.
“That’s three beers you owe me!” said Constable Dee Suzeraine with a wide smirk, to which Steve only shrugged with an acquiescing smile. “Another game?”
“Nah, not tonight,” said Steve. “I think I’m gonna take off.” He laid the cue down on the empty pool table. Dee only shrugged, not one to be easily down.
“Hey, it’s your loss. Don’t think you can skip out on those beers though!” Dee flashed him a grin and Steve chuckled.
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said.
Moving away from the pool table he found Fisk and Tootsie in another of their heated discussions, and, by the sound of it, the medical examiner still hadn’t gotten over the fact that their dear forensic expert owned a hermit crab called Howard. Neither had Steve for the matter of fact, but he was saving the ribbing for another day. His head was filled with other thoughts right now.
“I’m calling it a night,” he told them during a break of their discussion, picking up his jacket from a nearby chair. Fisk only nodded but Tootsie gave him a penetrable look.
“You dropping by Tessa’s?” she asked. Steve nodded. Tootsie didn’t say anything else, however, only inclining her head thoughtfully.
“See ya,” he said, feeling a bit of tension return to his neck underneath the stare of the medical examiner. Getting out of the crowded bar and into fresh air did wonders, and he breathed in the crisp night air deeply, feeling the tension leave as he strode back towards the Central.
As he walked along the half-empty pavement, Steve suddenly heard the bark of dogs in the distance. His head whipped up, half expecting to see his partner close to being mauled by frenzied dogs. Only dark streets barely illuminated by lamp posts and the usual noise of a sleepless city met his senses. No fences, no frightened voice calling out to him...
He shook his head. It wasn’t often he experienced these things and he wanted nothing more than to rid himself of them. The loss of control was eerily uncomfortable and he felt slightly lonely where he strode along the pavement, only passed once in a while by dark cabs and cars.
Turning at an intersection, Steve walked up to the garage door leading to the underground parking lot below the Central. He found his card and swiped it before punching the code. The door next to the wide carport opened and he stepped inside, closing it firmly behind him. Every city noise immediately silenced and there was only him and his footsteps.
The car was parked exactly where he had left it, a dark blue sedan most commonly used by civilian-clad officers. Without further ado he unlocked it and got in, moments later firing up the engine. Soon he was back at the carport, which opened with the push of a button installed next to the wheel, and rolled onto the street.
Joining the scarce line of cars out on the city streets, Steve couldn’t help but drift off again into thought. He looked at the phone he had fastened next to the stereo. No messages, no replies. It had been silent all night. No response to the many calls he had made to her cell phone and home phone. He wondered what she was doing; if going by her place would only be a dead end.
Though they had known each other for little more than two years now, Steve had started to get to know the enigma he had for a partner. Tessa Vance may be brilliant and obsessed, but when dealing with traumatic experiences she sought to familiar surroundings, whatever they may be. Occasionally he found her at home, other times she had been elsewhere. She hid, it was as easy as that. It was understandable, though. She had never been one for drinking and thus didn’t exactly share his and the others’ way of unwinding. Still, Steve had no idea what she usually did, but today seemed like one of those days he ought to find out.
***
Tessa had managed to pick herself off the shower floor once the water ran cold and get into some warm clothes. As if having regained some control, she towel-dried her curly hair and combed it back behind her ears, before finding soft flannel pants and t-shirt from her wardrobe to wear. She now lay on top of the covers of the bed; the windows were open but not offering very cool air. The sound of cars and distant voices reached her ears as she stared unseeingly on the wall, faintly registering the sounds before they vanished from her mind the next second.
She hugged her legs in the foetal-like position she had implemented, her throat sore and her eyes dry but burning still. She was so tired, but sleep eluded her as always. Nights had always been her worst moments and today’s events had certainly done nothing to improve the situation. It had in fact made it worse. At least that was her current hypothesis. All the clues were there right in front of her, taunting her, hounding her, never going to disappear. No matter how hard she tried, no sleep would come to her tonight.
Even a long, hot shower couldn’t rid her of the indiscernible scent.
The sudden knock on her door startled her, making her shoot up in bed and look around in frenzy, her heart pulsing wildly in her throat. The bark of a dog from somewhere impacted on her senses and Tessa jumped again, grasping the bed covers tightly in her hands, gasping as the familiar sense of dread penetrated her perception.
The dogs were there, staring at her. She had ignored the rule of not staring back into their eyes, thus instigating them to further action. It had been her fault. She hadn’t even checked if someone was around before she approached the fenced-in dog house! And now that face was staring at her again—
The knocking persisted, pulling her out of her thoughts, grounding her, reminding her she was not at the kennel. Not at the mercy of a malicious grin and growling dogs...
Tessa slid out of bed, her bare feet stumbling quickly towards the door as the raps became impatient. She twisted the deadlock and wrenched the door open, startled once again when she saw who was on the other side.
“Steve!”
Indeed, there he stood, her partner, looking very concerned above his loosened tie and open jacket.
“Tessa, are you okay?” he asked, eyebrows knitting together. Not knowing quite what to say she only pushed the door open. He strode through, pausing as he looked around the dark apartment only lit by the small lamp next to the couch. His eyes stopped by the still blinking answering machine.
“I called you several times,” he said, turning to look at her. Tessa stared dumbfounded at the blinking red light, still at a loss for words. “Hey.” He was suddenly next to her, hands on her shoulders. Those wonderful gentle eyes goaded her to look at him again.
Tessa felt her lower lip start to tremble and squeezed her eyes shut, knowing that any minute the tears would return if he continued staring at her like that. It didn’t help; it only brought them on in full force. The next thing she knew she was crumbling and then something warm was wrapped around her and a chin was nuzzling her hair as distinctive male smell permeated her senses.
***
Steve held the sleeping woman in his arms, reeling in everything that had happened. The broken woman meeting him at the door had been a shock, but somehow he got over it and set his mind on a different track. It had been instinct that drove him towards her and when she had started to cry he couldn’t help hugging her.
From the floor to the couch had been an easy enough affair, despite him carrying nearly all of her weight. She was a very small woman, he realised, and without her heels she barely reached his shoulders. And at the moment he could not see that brave and tough face she put on along with her trouser suits, only a woman who was vulnerable and insecure. Somehow the thought troubled him, but he didn’t know how or why.
She had cried herself to sleep. He didn’t know how long he had sat there, but she must have been exhausted nonetheless. By the looks of it, she had done nothing else either since she got home. No kitchen smell, no clutter, and he was sure he had caught glimpses of discarded clothes along the path into her bedroom. Only the damp hair against his shirt told tales of what she had done.
The thoughts flittering through his mind as he listened to her deep breaths were anything but organised. It was disconcerting, to say the least. He felt like he could barely control what was going on.
Although Tessa had not spoken a word, he knew her distress had to be due to the incident at the kennel today. Frankly, he had to be honest and say he was uncomfortable with the event as well. Seeing her trapped inside that cage, hearing her frenzied voice calling his name... Steve had to admit his hands had been shaking as they pried the gate open, his heart had been pounding and every second he had wondered if the dogs were going to abandon the item they were tearing apart and go for her instead. Then the door was open and she had run off as far as she could from the doghouse, giving him no other choice but to follow.
In hindsight, he wasn’t truly surprised. He had gotten used to running after her whenever she got it into her head to take off. He had, however, managed to sit her down while he went after the killer. In her state he hadn’t trusted her behind the wheels. He had, though, left her on her own tonight while he went to the bar to unwind.
Steve looked down at her calm features, gazing at the red and sore cheeks that even in her sleep made her look fragile and wounded. He regretted his trip to the bar right now, even if it was useless to think about such things now. What’s done was done and he couldn’t change that.
With a smirk Steve thought that no matter what he should or shouldn’t have done, sitting on his partner’s couch and holding her like he would a child wasn’t exactly what he had imagined anyway. Sure there had been hugs, but nothing quite like this.
Without thinking, he brushed a stray hair away from her face and was caught off guard when she sought further into his palm. Quickly, he withdrew his hand lest he wake her. He needn’t have worried; Tessa slept on without another twitch.
Silently, head swimming with thoughts he thought he had long since suppressed, Steve leaned further into the couch, preparing himself for a long haul.
The next day brought Tessa a major headache along with a kink in her neck. She found herself on the couch, a blanket draped over legs; it seemed to have fallen off her during the night. Confused, it took her befuddled mind a while to think back on what had happened and why she was lying on the couch. Soon her eyes widened as the vague memories filtered back as if in slow motion.
Steve had come last night and she had broken down. Then there had been warmth around her – Steve must have gestured her to the couch and held her – and then only blissful sleep only occasionally disrupted by bad dreams. But whenever she woke, she had taken only a moment to be calmed by another presence before falling asleep again. She had thought she was dreaming when Steve mumbled soft words of comfort to her or when she could sense the wondrous smell that was only his. It had been too surreal to be true. And yet Tessa was very sure it had been all but a dream.
A blush crept up her neck and seeped into her cheeks as Tessa clutched the blanket in her hands and inhaled. It was very faint, but she thought she could smell his scent still. It was musk and that particular scent that was solely his. Not even Brett had smelled so good.
Her eyes flew open as she shut her mind firmly to the thoughts that started to roam freely. Seeking a distraction, she looked around and found the apartment empty, eerily lit up with the rays of an early sun beyond the curtains. One of the rays caught off on something white by the dining table, and Tessa realised it was a piece of paper. As far as she knew, it had not been there yesterday.
Standing up on her feet, rolling her sore shoulders – whatever position she had lain in last night had not been good for her joints – and bending her head sideways to try working out the kink in her neck, Tessa went to the table. The joints felt marginally better, but she forgot all about the dulled pain once the note was in her hands.
It was from Steve.
Good morning!
You must have the worst kink today... Let me know and I’ll rub it for you.
Don’t bother coming in for work today. I’ll chase you home the minute I see you! I’ll take care of the remaining paperwork. You just rest up. You seem like you need it.
And if you need to talk to someone, I’m here. There’s no reason to hide away. You’ve got nothing to be ashamed off, and you certainly won’t feel better either. Like they say, you can run but you can’t hide.
Take care, Tess.
Steve
P.S. I’ll warn everyone to watch out for you, so don’t bother trying to sneak around me to get back to work!
A wide grin accompanied a chuckle, and Tessa felt momentarily better. Actually, when she thought about it and apart from the sore neck and shoulders, she felt loads better.
She read the note one more time, grinned, and laid it down on the table top. She wrapped her arms around herself as she stared back on the couch, imagining how the scene had looked last night.
Last night, no words had been exchanged, but none had been needed. Theirs was a relationship with little words. By his presence he had comforted her and Tessa felt immensely better. As long as she knew he was there for her, she could manage.
She picked up the blanket from the couch and inhaled the faint scent again.
END
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa Vance, Steve Hayden, Dee Suzeraine, Lance Fisk, Imogen ‘Tootsie’ Soames
Prompt: 036. Smell
Word Count: 2945
Rating: PG (K+)
Summary: After a traumatic experience a friend is in need of comfort.
Author’s Note: Coda to “Scent of Evil” (3x17) SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! Do not read if you do not wish to be spoiled. Also a small mention of Brett, Tessa’s ex-boyfriend from novel Deadline / Suspect by Jennifer Rowe.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
SCENT OF COMFORT
Emma Chambers: They can smell your fear.
Tessa Vance: Open the gate! (Chambers sprays the communicative scent on Tessa) No! (Chambers walks away)
(Steve arrives at the kennel. Chambers meet him in the hallway.)
Emma Chambers: The dogs’ve gone crazy – I can’t control them!
Steve Hayden: Where’s Detective Vance?
Emma Chambers: I’m gonna get help! (Steve is suspicious, runs off in the direction Chambers came from)
Steve Hayden: Tessa! Tessa!
Tessa Vance: (Lying on the ground trying to reach her gun under the fence door) I’m here! Over here, Steve! Open the gate! Get me the gun!
(Steve manage to get her out)
(From 'Scent of Evil', Murder Call, 3x17)
***
Detective Senior Constable Tessa Vance shut the door behind her with a loud click as the deadlock slid in place. For a moment she fingered with the chain, before leaving it hanging limply along the frame of the door. It was a silly notion to lock everything behind her. It would not bring any more comfort or security than she already had.
She turned on a small lamp by the grey couch, ignoring the red blinking light of the answering machine as she threw the handbag on top of the dining table. Shirking out of the high heels, Tessa felt cool surface touch the soles of her feet and fleetingly wondered if she should put some socks on. She never made it into the bedroom, however, as she drifted back towards the couch and slumped heavily into the cushions.
It was as if the smell was still on her even if she couldn’t sense it herself. That fact made it all worse. Not being able to sense the thing that made her a walking target for four-legged beings with snapping jaws...How lucky she had been to know about it rather than be taken by surprise. A very deadly surprise. The thought gave her no comfort either.
Standing up on her feet Tessa made her way into the bathroom, shedding the replacement jacket she had picked up before returning to the office. Following the jacket into the hamper was the white sweater and black pants, then the stockings. The underwear landed on the bathroom floor and the next moment she had hot water streaming down her face and body. With a good handful of soap she started rubbing it in, never bothering to turn the water off in the meantime, scrubbing and scrubbing until she felt hot and prickly all over.
Her chest started heaving as she saw the skin redden and she imagined the blood running all over her stomach and arms... Burning eyes unleashed tears that were swallowed by the hot water splashing on her face. She didn’t care about being careful lest her skin dry up. She didn’t care about washing her hair nurturingly once or twice. All she could see behind closed lids and hear beyond the water clouding her ears was the malicious grin through thin-wired fence and the voice dripping with taunting venom as the dogs growled behind her.
“They can smell your fear.”
Tessa slid down to the floor of the shower, wrapping her arms around her legs as the water still sprayed down on her. It was still there. That scent. She couldn’t shake it off. She couldn’t wash it off. It had ingrained itself into her skin.
Her throat constricted brokenly.
***
Watching the spunky redhead down the last ball, Detective Senior Constable Steve Hayden did the obligatory downcast chin as he acknowledged her victory.
“That’s three beers you owe me!” said Constable Dee Suzeraine with a wide smirk, to which Steve only shrugged with an acquiescing smile. “Another game?”
“Nah, not tonight,” said Steve. “I think I’m gonna take off.” He laid the cue down on the empty pool table. Dee only shrugged, not one to be easily down.
“Hey, it’s your loss. Don’t think you can skip out on those beers though!” Dee flashed him a grin and Steve chuckled.
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said.
Moving away from the pool table he found Fisk and Tootsie in another of their heated discussions, and, by the sound of it, the medical examiner still hadn’t gotten over the fact that their dear forensic expert owned a hermit crab called Howard. Neither had Steve for the matter of fact, but he was saving the ribbing for another day. His head was filled with other thoughts right now.
“I’m calling it a night,” he told them during a break of their discussion, picking up his jacket from a nearby chair. Fisk only nodded but Tootsie gave him a penetrable look.
“You dropping by Tessa’s?” she asked. Steve nodded. Tootsie didn’t say anything else, however, only inclining her head thoughtfully.
“See ya,” he said, feeling a bit of tension return to his neck underneath the stare of the medical examiner. Getting out of the crowded bar and into fresh air did wonders, and he breathed in the crisp night air deeply, feeling the tension leave as he strode back towards the Central.
As he walked along the half-empty pavement, Steve suddenly heard the bark of dogs in the distance. His head whipped up, half expecting to see his partner close to being mauled by frenzied dogs. Only dark streets barely illuminated by lamp posts and the usual noise of a sleepless city met his senses. No fences, no frightened voice calling out to him...
He shook his head. It wasn’t often he experienced these things and he wanted nothing more than to rid himself of them. The loss of control was eerily uncomfortable and he felt slightly lonely where he strode along the pavement, only passed once in a while by dark cabs and cars.
Turning at an intersection, Steve walked up to the garage door leading to the underground parking lot below the Central. He found his card and swiped it before punching the code. The door next to the wide carport opened and he stepped inside, closing it firmly behind him. Every city noise immediately silenced and there was only him and his footsteps.
The car was parked exactly where he had left it, a dark blue sedan most commonly used by civilian-clad officers. Without further ado he unlocked it and got in, moments later firing up the engine. Soon he was back at the carport, which opened with the push of a button installed next to the wheel, and rolled onto the street.
Joining the scarce line of cars out on the city streets, Steve couldn’t help but drift off again into thought. He looked at the phone he had fastened next to the stereo. No messages, no replies. It had been silent all night. No response to the many calls he had made to her cell phone and home phone. He wondered what she was doing; if going by her place would only be a dead end.
Though they had known each other for little more than two years now, Steve had started to get to know the enigma he had for a partner. Tessa Vance may be brilliant and obsessed, but when dealing with traumatic experiences she sought to familiar surroundings, whatever they may be. Occasionally he found her at home, other times she had been elsewhere. She hid, it was as easy as that. It was understandable, though. She had never been one for drinking and thus didn’t exactly share his and the others’ way of unwinding. Still, Steve had no idea what she usually did, but today seemed like one of those days he ought to find out.
***
Tessa had managed to pick herself off the shower floor once the water ran cold and get into some warm clothes. As if having regained some control, she towel-dried her curly hair and combed it back behind her ears, before finding soft flannel pants and t-shirt from her wardrobe to wear. She now lay on top of the covers of the bed; the windows were open but not offering very cool air. The sound of cars and distant voices reached her ears as she stared unseeingly on the wall, faintly registering the sounds before they vanished from her mind the next second.
She hugged her legs in the foetal-like position she had implemented, her throat sore and her eyes dry but burning still. She was so tired, but sleep eluded her as always. Nights had always been her worst moments and today’s events had certainly done nothing to improve the situation. It had in fact made it worse. At least that was her current hypothesis. All the clues were there right in front of her, taunting her, hounding her, never going to disappear. No matter how hard she tried, no sleep would come to her tonight.
Even a long, hot shower couldn’t rid her of the indiscernible scent.
The sudden knock on her door startled her, making her shoot up in bed and look around in frenzy, her heart pulsing wildly in her throat. The bark of a dog from somewhere impacted on her senses and Tessa jumped again, grasping the bed covers tightly in her hands, gasping as the familiar sense of dread penetrated her perception.
The dogs were there, staring at her. She had ignored the rule of not staring back into their eyes, thus instigating them to further action. It had been her fault. She hadn’t even checked if someone was around before she approached the fenced-in dog house! And now that face was staring at her again—
The knocking persisted, pulling her out of her thoughts, grounding her, reminding her she was not at the kennel. Not at the mercy of a malicious grin and growling dogs...
Tessa slid out of bed, her bare feet stumbling quickly towards the door as the raps became impatient. She twisted the deadlock and wrenched the door open, startled once again when she saw who was on the other side.
“Steve!”
Indeed, there he stood, her partner, looking very concerned above his loosened tie and open jacket.
“Tessa, are you okay?” he asked, eyebrows knitting together. Not knowing quite what to say she only pushed the door open. He strode through, pausing as he looked around the dark apartment only lit by the small lamp next to the couch. His eyes stopped by the still blinking answering machine.
“I called you several times,” he said, turning to look at her. Tessa stared dumbfounded at the blinking red light, still at a loss for words. “Hey.” He was suddenly next to her, hands on her shoulders. Those wonderful gentle eyes goaded her to look at him again.
Tessa felt her lower lip start to tremble and squeezed her eyes shut, knowing that any minute the tears would return if he continued staring at her like that. It didn’t help; it only brought them on in full force. The next thing she knew she was crumbling and then something warm was wrapped around her and a chin was nuzzling her hair as distinctive male smell permeated her senses.
***
Steve held the sleeping woman in his arms, reeling in everything that had happened. The broken woman meeting him at the door had been a shock, but somehow he got over it and set his mind on a different track. It had been instinct that drove him towards her and when she had started to cry he couldn’t help hugging her.
From the floor to the couch had been an easy enough affair, despite him carrying nearly all of her weight. She was a very small woman, he realised, and without her heels she barely reached his shoulders. And at the moment he could not see that brave and tough face she put on along with her trouser suits, only a woman who was vulnerable and insecure. Somehow the thought troubled him, but he didn’t know how or why.
She had cried herself to sleep. He didn’t know how long he had sat there, but she must have been exhausted nonetheless. By the looks of it, she had done nothing else either since she got home. No kitchen smell, no clutter, and he was sure he had caught glimpses of discarded clothes along the path into her bedroom. Only the damp hair against his shirt told tales of what she had done.
The thoughts flittering through his mind as he listened to her deep breaths were anything but organised. It was disconcerting, to say the least. He felt like he could barely control what was going on.
Although Tessa had not spoken a word, he knew her distress had to be due to the incident at the kennel today. Frankly, he had to be honest and say he was uncomfortable with the event as well. Seeing her trapped inside that cage, hearing her frenzied voice calling his name... Steve had to admit his hands had been shaking as they pried the gate open, his heart had been pounding and every second he had wondered if the dogs were going to abandon the item they were tearing apart and go for her instead. Then the door was open and she had run off as far as she could from the doghouse, giving him no other choice but to follow.
In hindsight, he wasn’t truly surprised. He had gotten used to running after her whenever she got it into her head to take off. He had, however, managed to sit her down while he went after the killer. In her state he hadn’t trusted her behind the wheels. He had, though, left her on her own tonight while he went to the bar to unwind.
Steve looked down at her calm features, gazing at the red and sore cheeks that even in her sleep made her look fragile and wounded. He regretted his trip to the bar right now, even if it was useless to think about such things now. What’s done was done and he couldn’t change that.
With a smirk Steve thought that no matter what he should or shouldn’t have done, sitting on his partner’s couch and holding her like he would a child wasn’t exactly what he had imagined anyway. Sure there had been hugs, but nothing quite like this.
Without thinking, he brushed a stray hair away from her face and was caught off guard when she sought further into his palm. Quickly, he withdrew his hand lest he wake her. He needn’t have worried; Tessa slept on without another twitch.
Silently, head swimming with thoughts he thought he had long since suppressed, Steve leaned further into the couch, preparing himself for a long haul.
The next day brought Tessa a major headache along with a kink in her neck. She found herself on the couch, a blanket draped over legs; it seemed to have fallen off her during the night. Confused, it took her befuddled mind a while to think back on what had happened and why she was lying on the couch. Soon her eyes widened as the vague memories filtered back as if in slow motion.
Steve had come last night and she had broken down. Then there had been warmth around her – Steve must have gestured her to the couch and held her – and then only blissful sleep only occasionally disrupted by bad dreams. But whenever she woke, she had taken only a moment to be calmed by another presence before falling asleep again. She had thought she was dreaming when Steve mumbled soft words of comfort to her or when she could sense the wondrous smell that was only his. It had been too surreal to be true. And yet Tessa was very sure it had been all but a dream.
A blush crept up her neck and seeped into her cheeks as Tessa clutched the blanket in her hands and inhaled. It was very faint, but she thought she could smell his scent still. It was musk and that particular scent that was solely his. Not even Brett had smelled so good.
Her eyes flew open as she shut her mind firmly to the thoughts that started to roam freely. Seeking a distraction, she looked around and found the apartment empty, eerily lit up with the rays of an early sun beyond the curtains. One of the rays caught off on something white by the dining table, and Tessa realised it was a piece of paper. As far as she knew, it had not been there yesterday.
Standing up on her feet, rolling her sore shoulders – whatever position she had lain in last night had not been good for her joints – and bending her head sideways to try working out the kink in her neck, Tessa went to the table. The joints felt marginally better, but she forgot all about the dulled pain once the note was in her hands.
It was from Steve.
Good morning!
You must have the worst kink today... Let me know and I’ll rub it for you.
Don’t bother coming in for work today. I’ll chase you home the minute I see you! I’ll take care of the remaining paperwork. You just rest up. You seem like you need it.
And if you need to talk to someone, I’m here. There’s no reason to hide away. You’ve got nothing to be ashamed off, and you certainly won’t feel better either. Like they say, you can run but you can’t hide.
Take care, Tess.
Steve
P.S. I’ll warn everyone to watch out for you, so don’t bother trying to sneak around me to get back to work!
A wide grin accompanied a chuckle, and Tessa felt momentarily better. Actually, when she thought about it and apart from the sore neck and shoulders, she felt loads better.
She read the note one more time, grinned, and laid it down on the table top. She wrapped her arms around herself as she stared back on the couch, imagining how the scene had looked last night.
Last night, no words had been exchanged, but none had been needed. Theirs was a relationship with little words. By his presence he had comforted her and Tessa felt immensely better. As long as she knew he was there for her, she could manage.
She picked up the blanket from the couch and inhaled the faint scent again.
END
tirsdag 3. juni 2008
Fic: A Sparrow's Fall
Title: A Sparrow's Fall
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa/Steve, OC
Prompt: 030. Death
Word Count: 856 (Mac Word)
Rating: PG
Summary: The loss is sometimes too great for words.
Author's Notes: Title adapted from a Norwegian funeral song: "Ikke en spurv faller til jorden uten at Gud det vet" (Not a sparrow falls to the ground without God knowing).
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
**
There was no stopping the pain shooting through her chest as the casket was lowered into the ground. A small pristinely white thing carrying a piece of her heart to eternal resting: it was unfair. It should have been her. But the powers that be had not listened to her. It had all been for naught. A second was all it took – a sliver of their millions of seconds that would never be regained. Gone and lost forever.
He returned from lowering the casket, his hand clenched as if still gripping the rope. She leaned into his side, seeking comfort that was slow coming. No more tears ran down her cheeks; she had run empty. His arms tucked around her shoulders and she could hear his heart beat quickly beneath his heavy jacket, the slight trembles alerting her to the cries he held back.
Time passed so slowly. Even with the cold weather, the sun shone. She could not help but think it was treacherous, at the same time overcome by the rays falling on the colourful flowers and making the scene so beautiful. Such a stark opposite to the last time she had been forced to see someone she loved buried in the cold winter ground.
A sob escaped her lips, but she had no more tears to offer, and her throat was sore. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. They had been so happy, so overjoyed by the turn of events. The possibility of losing it before it began had not even crossed their minds.
His arm tightened around her and his cheek leaned on the top of her head. She drew her arms around him, hugging him tightly, finally drawing her eyes away from the flowers to drown in the dark fabric of his jacket. It hurt so much. The wound had been ripped open today instead of mending. She didn’t know how she would bear it.
He dropped a kiss on her hair and she remembered her father, who used to do the same thing when she was upset, and she managed to squeeze out a few more wet trails into the heavy material. Her throat hurt, her chest hurt, and her belly felt empty. She had not been ready for this. It had taken her completely off guard. She gripped the material of his jacket in her hands, uttering a guttural sound in her half-sob.
Not a care for watching eyes did she feel. All she wanted was to bury herself in their bed in their dark bedroom, only him and her, and lie there forever. She was sick of condolences, of concerned conversations and the ever-pitying looks. She was tired of being sick of it. It was a circle that never ended.
A sudden hiccup from the chest against her face alerted her to his distress, and she hugged him closer, nearly choking him as silent sobs took hold of him. A moment of weakness, it made her aware there was something more to him than a secure rock in the stream. He was hurting too.
For long moments, she simply gripped him tight, long past listening to their surroundings, finding her own sobs escaping silently with his until they both calmed down. Another kiss on her hair and she finally drew back, gazing up into his eyes and seeing the ghostly trails of tears down his cheeks. She wiped it off as he did with her, and she nearly came undone again with the pain mirrored in his eyes. It was as if he had aged ten years in the past two weeks. He was wearied, thin, drawn. But there was something else there as well: a small glimmer that nearly drowned in the darkness as he cast a look down beside her.
She followed his gaze to the small blue eyes peering up at them, the quivering lip, and the small hands fisted in her skirt and his pants. Neither of them had noticed and didn’t know how long the boy had stood there.
“Mama?”
Her heart soared even as a stab of pain jolted through her. She looked up to the side and met their friends’ mournful faces standing several metres away, sympathy written all over them, and the elder woman who had been unofficial aunt looked apologetic. Tessa simply gave her a look and then leaned down to pick Jonas up in her tired arms.
“Don’t be sad,” Jonas told her and ran his chubby hand clumsily over her cheeks, mimicking his father’s previous gesture. He then twisted in her arms and reached up to his father to do the same.
A ghost of a smile crossed Steve’s features and he caught the boy’s hand to kiss it softly as Tessa shifted the boy in her arms. “We’ll try,” he promised, meeting her eyes after ruffling the boy’s hair. She cleared her throat, but was too emotional to speak. Her eyes burned.
And as she silently passed her son to Steve, who reached the other arm around her and drew her close, she found she didn’t need to speak at all.
END
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa/Steve, OC
Prompt: 030. Death
Word Count: 856 (Mac Word)
Rating: PG
Summary: The loss is sometimes too great for words.
Author's Notes: Title adapted from a Norwegian funeral song: "Ikke en spurv faller til jorden uten at Gud det vet" (Not a sparrow falls to the ground without God knowing).
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
**
There was no stopping the pain shooting through her chest as the casket was lowered into the ground. A small pristinely white thing carrying a piece of her heart to eternal resting: it was unfair. It should have been her. But the powers that be had not listened to her. It had all been for naught. A second was all it took – a sliver of their millions of seconds that would never be regained. Gone and lost forever.
He returned from lowering the casket, his hand clenched as if still gripping the rope. She leaned into his side, seeking comfort that was slow coming. No more tears ran down her cheeks; she had run empty. His arms tucked around her shoulders and she could hear his heart beat quickly beneath his heavy jacket, the slight trembles alerting her to the cries he held back.
Time passed so slowly. Even with the cold weather, the sun shone. She could not help but think it was treacherous, at the same time overcome by the rays falling on the colourful flowers and making the scene so beautiful. Such a stark opposite to the last time she had been forced to see someone she loved buried in the cold winter ground.
A sob escaped her lips, but she had no more tears to offer, and her throat was sore. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. They had been so happy, so overjoyed by the turn of events. The possibility of losing it before it began had not even crossed their minds.
His arm tightened around her and his cheek leaned on the top of her head. She drew her arms around him, hugging him tightly, finally drawing her eyes away from the flowers to drown in the dark fabric of his jacket. It hurt so much. The wound had been ripped open today instead of mending. She didn’t know how she would bear it.
He dropped a kiss on her hair and she remembered her father, who used to do the same thing when she was upset, and she managed to squeeze out a few more wet trails into the heavy material. Her throat hurt, her chest hurt, and her belly felt empty. She had not been ready for this. It had taken her completely off guard. She gripped the material of his jacket in her hands, uttering a guttural sound in her half-sob.
Not a care for watching eyes did she feel. All she wanted was to bury herself in their bed in their dark bedroom, only him and her, and lie there forever. She was sick of condolences, of concerned conversations and the ever-pitying looks. She was tired of being sick of it. It was a circle that never ended.
A sudden hiccup from the chest against her face alerted her to his distress, and she hugged him closer, nearly choking him as silent sobs took hold of him. A moment of weakness, it made her aware there was something more to him than a secure rock in the stream. He was hurting too.
For long moments, she simply gripped him tight, long past listening to their surroundings, finding her own sobs escaping silently with his until they both calmed down. Another kiss on her hair and she finally drew back, gazing up into his eyes and seeing the ghostly trails of tears down his cheeks. She wiped it off as he did with her, and she nearly came undone again with the pain mirrored in his eyes. It was as if he had aged ten years in the past two weeks. He was wearied, thin, drawn. But there was something else there as well: a small glimmer that nearly drowned in the darkness as he cast a look down beside her.
She followed his gaze to the small blue eyes peering up at them, the quivering lip, and the small hands fisted in her skirt and his pants. Neither of them had noticed and didn’t know how long the boy had stood there.
“Mama?”
Her heart soared even as a stab of pain jolted through her. She looked up to the side and met their friends’ mournful faces standing several metres away, sympathy written all over them, and the elder woman who had been unofficial aunt looked apologetic. Tessa simply gave her a look and then leaned down to pick Jonas up in her tired arms.
“Don’t be sad,” Jonas told her and ran his chubby hand clumsily over her cheeks, mimicking his father’s previous gesture. He then twisted in her arms and reached up to his father to do the same.
A ghost of a smile crossed Steve’s features and he caught the boy’s hand to kiss it softly as Tessa shifted the boy in her arms. “We’ll try,” he promised, meeting her eyes after ruffling the boy’s hair. She cleared her throat, but was too emotional to speak. Her eyes burned.
And as she silently passed her son to Steve, who reached the other arm around her and drew her close, she found she didn’t need to speak at all.
END
Pic: Hands
click here for bigger view
I made this last summer. The fingers weren't my best piece of art, but they'll do. My reference pic can be found here.
lørdag 31. mai 2008
Fic: Last Goodbye
Title: Last Goodbye
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa, Steve
Prompt: 033. Too Much
Word Count: 2181 (Mac Word)
Rating: PG
Summary: It was the last goodbye.
Author's Notes: Inspired by Jeff Buckley's song "Last Goodbye". First in a trilogy.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
***
“I’m sorry. I can’t do this anymore.”
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa, Steve
Prompt: 033. Too Much
Word Count: 2181 (Mac Word)
Rating: PG
Summary: It was the last goodbye.
Author's Notes: Inspired by Jeff Buckley's song "Last Goodbye". First in a trilogy.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
***
“I’m sorry. I can’t do this anymore.”
Detective Senior Constable Tessa Vance stared at the clean desk opposite hers; struck by the realisation it did not fit in. There was no clutter of files, no mugs with day-old coffee left in them, and no bright yellow post-it notes stuck to the side of the telephone. Square lines, rectangular shapes: the telephone and the laptop – now cleaned of all personal files – were lined up perfectly on the side of the desk.
It was such a stark opposite of what she was used to. Sure, her desk was even worse than his – she could never have any sort of order in her papers – but therein laid the problem: her desk still was. His was cleaned up and free of personal effects, in short back to the monotonous, naked and lifeless situation it had had before, prepped and ready for a new day, a new arrival, a new personality.
He really was gone.
Standing still behind her chair, handbag slung over her shoulder, preparing to leave for the day, Tessa could hardly believe it. There had been a time when it would not have surprised him, like in their early days when things were rocky and he seemed to like nothing more than either bail out or get rid of her. But that was years ago. To her, things had changed. They got along; they might even call themselves best friends. Although it was rather common for partners to form a strong bond, she had thought...
Tessa shook her head, blinking her eyes at the same time, welcoming the pause from the sight in front of her. She was not exactly quite sure what she had thought, but it had been something that had seemed important at one point. Now it was all a blank spot in her mind.
She sighed, opening her eyes and lifting them to the scene in front of her. It seemed so out of place, like a dream, but it was truly real. This is what happened in Homicide. People would tell her it was not all that uncommon or surprising he went off. Well, she had not seen it coming. In truth, she had thought counselling had helped him, but instead he had backed out.
“You right?”
Tessa startled at the sudden intrusion into her cotton-wrapped bubble, the bubble bursting with a silent ‘pop!’, and she looked to the side. Constable Dee Suzeraine’s brown eyes peered at her above a frown, genuine worry in her face.
“I’m fine.”
Tessa smiled, but it came out all wrong. She saw the brow furrow even more and crossed her arms.
“Really, I’m fine. I’m just tired. It’s been a long day.”
“You been cleaning up for him?” Dee pointed to the cardboard box in Tessa’s arms, clearly disapproving. “He should do that himself, you know. He’s not helpless.”
“I know that,” said Tessa curtly, letting out an annoyed breath. “I just didn’t want him to worry about it. He’s got enough on his plate with the moving and all. And it’s not as if it was a great sacrifice on my part.”
“Still,” said Dee, “you’re not his partner anymore. It’s not as if there’s any obligation.” Tessa narrowed her eyes at the younger constable, wondering what her problem was. It was just some personal stuff.
“All the same, I’m happy to do it. It’s the least I could do…”
“What? Listen to yourself, Tessa! Don’t you think he’s taking it a bit far?” Dee’s face was slightly red with an angry flush, and her hands were fisting at her side. “Don’t you think you deserve better than getting it all rubbed in your face?”
“Dee,” warned Tessa, closing her eyes momentarily before she let her mouth run off with her. It had been a hard skill to achieve, but in five years she had started to get the hang of it.
“No, Tessa, I think it’s unfair! Why should you sort out HIS problem?”
“Because I’m his partner!” Tessa met Dee’s eyes, seeing how the redhead locked her jaw and did a good Thorne impression on his bad days. The retaliation was in her face, and Tessa sighed. “Even if we’re not going to work together anymore, I still feel like we’re partners and partners look after each other.”
“I think you’re delusional,” retorted Dee hotly, but more subdued, as if she thought of her like a lost cause. Tessa found the thought hurt a bit. There was nothing wrong in helping out a good friend, right? Why should she get the third degree when simply playing the Good Samaritan?
“Sorry, I won’t get in your way,” continued Dee and turned on her heel, storming through the glass doors before Tessa could come up with a reply.
As she saw her friend’s back disappear around the corner, she found she could not find any and instead only felt angry and annoyed. Hefting her handbag higher on her shoulder, settling the box in the crook of her arm, Tessa dropped one last look at the contrasting desks before leaving the dimmed office.
*
“Give her time. She’s just hurt,” said Tootsie gently as the two of them sat on Tessa’s grey sofa later that night. “Dee’s known him longer than you have and they had a good rapport. She’ll miss him.”
Tessa played with her half-empty wine glass, staring at the red content and feeling like the roles should be different. It certainly felt like someone had drank up some of her as well.
“I’ll miss him too,” she said quietly. She did not look up; already knowing Tootsie would have that look she wore. Her nails were growing long. She would have to do something about that later.
“Of course you’ll do,” commented Tootsie to Tessa’s previous statement. “You’ve been partners for five years. You’ve been through some tough times together. It’s only sad you didn’t get some happy times as well.”
“Tootsie…”
“I’m sorry, I promised I wouldn’t mention it again, but it just pains me to see you like this. It’s only been a week and you’re already…” The pathologist drifted off with a sigh. Tessa said nothing, feeling like nothing came to mind, even with the implied statements that would normally get a rise out of her. She simply was not up to it.
“Tessa, have you talked to him in the last week?” When Tessa opened her mouth in reply, Tootsie added, “I mean, apart from when you dropped off his personal effects earlier.”
Tessa met her friend’s eyes briefly before shaking her head. “No, not really. He’s been busy.”
“Busy packing up,” Tootsie clarified, to which Tessa only nodded and then looked into her wine glass again. “Tessa… I know you think you’re helping, but aren’t you really pushing away from him?”
“I wouldn’t be the first,” she retorted before she could help herself. She was surprised to hear a slight venom in her voice and wondered what the hell was wrong with her.
“Tessa…” Tootsie let out a sigh.
“I’m sorry. I just…” Tessa fiddled with her glass angrily. “I can’t believe he’s leaving. Even when I cleared up his desk today, it didn’t feel real.”
“Maybe because you were doing it and not him?” suggested Tootsie. Tessa realised she had not thought about that. It made sense, though. “You know, Dee was right about one thing. He shouldn’t lay this on your shoulders. Yes, he’s been through some rough stuff and is still coping, but it’s still his choice, his decision.”
Tessa set the glass onto the table and rose from the sofa, pacing a little bit before slipping out of her jacket and slinging it over the back of a kitchen chair. A hand ran through her hair, messing it up, but she did not care. To hell with it all!
“You still feel guilty, don’t you?” asked Tootsie quietly, but her voice carried weight in the tense atmosphere surrounding Tessa. “You’re still going out of your way to help him.” Tessa halted in her pacing, back to her friend, eyes on the streetlight filtering through the shades.
She suddenly felt tears in her eyes as she remembered his pained eyes and the knowledge that she had not been there for him. The sob stopped in her throat.
A sudden hand on her arm told her Tootsie had stood up from the sofa as well. “You did your best, Tessa. He just couldn’t cope with it anymore. But he’s also stronger. You can step back now.”
It broke the dam Tessa had been storing up for days, and she leaned into the half-hug Tootsie gave her as she led her back to the sofa, crying silently.
*
The moving van was already speeding down Arthur Street, off towards a new life and new possibilities. A life without Homicide. His car was waiting behind him, the engine running – ready to take off as soon as possible. It stressed her out.
“You’re gonna be fine, then?” asked Tessa, shifting on her feet, arms crossed.
“Yeah. Eventually.”
His hands were tucked into his pockets and Steve Hayden had never looked more gorgeous. Even with a thin and wearied face, a spark had been lit in his eyes, and Tessa found she could live with anything that made him happy.
“You should come visit sometime,” said Steve, giving her a small smile as he scraped the ground with his shoe. Sneakers – not the dark shoes he had to wear to work. There was nothing remotely similar to a Homicide detective in front of her if not in his slightly tense posture. A blue sweater and corduroy trousers had replaced white shirt, navy suit and striped tie. Even his hair was slightly ruffled.
“I could show you the farm,” continued Steve and Tessa shook herself out of her momentary reverie. She met his eyes and managed a small chuckle.
“As long as you don’t try that ‘more stars in the country’ routine. It’s getting old.”
It earned her a slight grin and she felt better, less empty, but the feeling soon drained away as he glanced at the running car behind him, clearly impatient to get on his way.
“I won’t hold you up any longer,” Tessa told him. “You’re probably eager to see your mum and dad again.”
She was slightly taken aback when his smile faltered a bit and an indescribable look crossed his features. He scraped the earth again and hunched his shoulders, losing some of the spark in his eyes. Was that…?
“Have a good trip,” said Tessa too brightly, realising her mistake when his eyes met hers again. Her heart throbbed painfully and she felt her throat thicken. Inwardly she swore – she was not supposed to lose it in front of him.
Before she could react, Steve had stepped up to her and gathered her in a tight hug. It was like nothing and everything they had done before. And the way his nose snuggled into the crook of her neck brought a sense of finality into the air around them, and to Tessa’s insides. In that second she thought she knew all there was to know of the things that really mattered in the world, and she had never felt such a strong pull to stop him from going, to do anything in her power to hold on to him. But she also realised in the same second that it was never meant to be. When they drew apart, that would be it. No turning back from this point. It would be going forward for both of them, but on separate roads. She had wasted her chances and made her choice, just as he had made his.
This was the last goodbye.
The tears in her eyes fell silently down her cheek as she returned the hug fiercely, somehow pouring her everything into it, and his grip was just as tight. She kept back the sob, but he still ran a gentle hand over her hair, pulling her close for another moment and then suddenly the pressure was gone and only cool wind caressed her wet cheeks.
Steve stood between the open car door and the car, staring at her with that same indiscernible look he wore earlier, and then smiled gently at her.
“Keep in touch.”
Tessa swallowed her tears and sniffled as quietly as she could. She tried to smile, even if it came out all wrong, she was sure. “You too.”
Another heartbeat of silence and then Steve simply nodded and got into the car, closing the door. Tessa gave him a short wave after he got buckled in, and then he was pulling out on Arthur Street, following in the wake of the moving van. Towards a new life without Homicide.
Without her.
Endsøndag 25. mai 2008
Fic: Aftermath
Title: Aftermath
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa, Steve
Prompt: 001. Beginnings
Word Count: 1914(Mac Word)
Rating: PG
Summary: Coda to the novel "Deadline"/"Suspect" by Jennifer Rowe.
Author's Notes: The first story I wrote in direct reply to the 100-fic challenge. Also the first gen fic I wrote with Tessa and Steve (i.e. no romance).
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
**
God, she wanted nothing more than crawl into bed and sleep for a week. Never in her life had she been so physically and mentally exhausted. If this was what she had signed up for, then... Then what? She had signed up for this. Pushed through the ranks, even, just to get the open spot when it became available. Waited for two years stuck in a suburb police station as a general duties detective, reading the ads every day and listening to the grapevine, simply waiting for the day she could get her chance.
It had taken four tries, however. Central Homicide was both an attraction and a curse, and you were either stuck with it or gave up within the first few months. If you managed to get past the first hellish months, you could never let it go. That’s what her father had told her once, as an explanation to her naive yet raging demand as to why he left in the middle of dinner again. You couldn’t get out once you were in over your head.
Gazing across the car at her week-old partner, Detective Senior Constable Tessa Vance let her tired mind wonder where his feelings on the matter were. Was he already stuck, or was he still able to get out? It struck her how little she actually knew about him. It hadn’t taken her this long to get to know her old partner.
Then again, you haven’t gotten off to an excellent start either, her mind reminded her wryly.
Tessa agreed silently, withdrawing and settling her eyes on the flashing lights passing by in colourful streaks. They were already in downtown Sydney, fifteen minutes into the departure from the seaside amusement park filled with horrible memories and old ghosts. Being late evening, the city was bustling with the night life so closely related to this part of town. Tessa watched the people on the sidewalks, a sense of melancholy falling over her.
Her partner was driving her home, back to a place that had recently been the epicentre of upheavals in her life. She wondered if it could still be her sanctuary, but now it all depended on whether things had been settled there or not. Were they coming back to flashing blue lights and curious neighbours? She had no idea. She had just gotten into the car, the adrenaline leaving her and replaced by the early stages of shock.
Head raging with the chaos of the past week, Tessa felt a shiver run up her spine and huddled into Steve’s jacket, the familiar smell of male calming her down. Apart from a building headache, she felt disgusting and in need of a hot shower. Her shirt was still sticky with orange juice and blood. Orange juice from a clumsy clerk. Blood from a knife held at her throat and making a nick when trying to escape.
A sudden onwash of fresh tears shocked her and Tessa quickly turned her head away lest Steve would see them running down her cheeks. She squeezed her eyes closed, making stars appear in the dull darkness as a sharp thrust ran through her heart.
She was not going to cry! Not here, not in front of him! His first impression of her was probably horrible enough without her adding to it. Tessa swallowed a rising sob, folding her arms around herself tightly beneath the suit jacket, and stared stoically out on the bustling city night life.
This is not the time. Pull yourself together. This is better kept behind doors.
A few minutes later, Tessa felt control slipping back to her and rejoiced silently until the car made a turn and headed down a familiar road. Just a few more blocks and she would be home.
Home.
Steve must have given it some thought as well, because as they made the last turn down Adamson Avenue, he spoke up for the first time since he had started up the car.
“You gonna be okay?”
It startled her out of her jumbled thoughts and emotions, nearly making her blurt out ‘no’ before grabbing a hold of herself. She was silent for a few moments, watching the looming building rise in front of the car and the lack of uniformed cars, finally replying once the car slipped into the parking lot. “Yeah.”
She couldn’t tell whether he believed her or not, nor understand why she would care about that, but she thought his lips twitched slightly as if to pursue further interrogation. However, he said nothing more, simply nodding and giving off a small smile. It suited him. More than the slightly annoyed look he had been wearing nearly all week.
Still, he sat and watched her as her hand froze on the handle, her chest constricting slightly at the sight of a building that had just hours before been occupied with a face from the past. A face she could have very well done without. But who didn't want to change the past or control the future? It was futile.
Another second ticked by and Tessa snapped out of if, wringing her arms loose from the tight tangle they had wrapped themselves in, starting to pull off the suit jacket and the calming scent. She froze when she spotted a dark splotch on the lapel.
“Oh no!” she exclaimed suddenly, “I got blood on your jacket!”
“It’s okay.”
“What? No! It’s not okay! I—I... Look, I’ll take it to the dry cleaners. You’ll get it back tomorrow, I swear.”
“It’s okay,” Steve said firmly, stopping her nervous ramble with a warm hand upon hers. It stopped her instantaneously. She looked at the hand as it brought back the same shot of warmth she had felt at the stake-out earlier. “I’ll take care of it,” Steve added, meeting her eyes. She swallowed, her heartbeat coming down from the sudden rush.
“Are you sure? I mean, it’s my fault—I should—“
“Tessa...” Steve started warningly and she paused again, shocked by the firmness in his voice. It reminded her how stubborn he could be. It also reminded her how stubborn she could be. And in the midst of that, she liked the way he spoke her name.
Her fingers relinquished the white-knuckled hold they had had on the jacket.
“Thank you,” Steve said, taking the jacket and holding it in his hands as he let out a small breath. He then met her eyes again. “Are you sure you’re going to be all right?”
“Yes,” Tessa replied immediately, a bit rushed, and he rose an eyebrow in doubt. “Yes, I’ll be fine,” she said again, a bit more convincing, plastering a smile on her face that hurt as it stretched sore throat muscles. She grimaced only briefly, already putting her hands on the seatbelt and unbuckling. “Thank you for the ride.”
She climbed out into the hot but fresh night air, her eyes tearing up by the breeze hitting her face, and closed the door. Seconds later, the other door opened and Steve’s voice sounded through the darkness.
“You don’t have to stay here tonight.” Tessa’s eyes widened as she turned to meet his above the roof of the car. “I mean, I’ve got a spare room if you...” He drifted off, obviously uncomfortable. However, it sent a warm sensation to her stomach and her smile was a little more real this time.
“Thank you,” she said honestly, “but I’ll be fine.” He gave her an uncertain look and she crumbled slightly. “Okay, maybe not exactly fine, but I’ll be all right. In the end,” she added in a mumble.
“Right,” Steve said finally. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then. You want me to pick you up?”
“That’d be nice,” Tessa smiled.
“Okay, I’ll drop by in the morning. Don’t forget the doctor’s orders.” His words were warm and amused, and Tessa chuckled lightly.
“I won’t. Thank you. I’ll...” She paused, stealing a glance at the looming three-story building. She let out a sigh. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Good night.”
“Night,” Steve replied as she walked away from the car towards the entrance. She heard the door slam and the engine fire up again, and then the car was reversing into the street and speeding off into the bustling Friday night.
Just like that. No more argument, no more obvious concern. Brett would have been relentless, at least until he got fed up and left her alone to go brood somewhere else. Tessa shook her head quickly, trying to get her thoughts off track. Brett was gone and her partner had nothing to do with him. He was just a guy in the right place at the wrong time. If things had been different... No, she couldn't afford to go down that road. It would not do her any good moaning for any male wandering by because she was simply lonely and desperate.
Tessa wiped off the stray tears that had somehow wound their way down her cheeks and went inside the large apartment building. Once she closed the apartment door behind her, the trashed living room glaring at her in the darkness, she was reminded yet again that he was gone and she was all alone. It took a very long moment before she reacted.
A piece of red police sealing tape was stuck in her hand from being ripped off the doorway; she slung it into the garbage bin along with a broken vase and some other items. Fixing the pillows and blankets on the couch, an overturned chair, tidying up the mess her past had created. Then she went to the house phone, plugging it back in. Seconds later she was calling the name on the card that had been left behind on the door frame. A detective Jack Simmons.
The detective wanted her to come in tomorrow for her statement. Initially, he wanted to talk to her tonight, as well as get some photograps taken of the injuries she had gotten, but she told him the photos had already been taken (courtesy of constable Dee Suzeraine) and he relented. The place had already been looked at by the forensics, so she was welcome to stay, though he did ask whether there was someplace else she could spend the night. His voice was calm, warm and reassuring, and Tessa felt her shoulders relax.
After hanging up, Tessa sent another look around the apartment. Even with the small clean-up she had just done, there was still marks of where the blood had been, and where the struggle had made tears in furniture. She could still smell him. The breath on her neck. The whisper into her ear, instructing her what lies to tell Steve, chuckling. The knife on her neck...
The phone was once more in her hands and she stared at it uncertainly, biting her lip. Two possibilities. One certain and the other uncertain. Both bringing security in some way. Either sensible or desperate, it was her choice.
She punched the numbers and waited for someone to pick it up. A few beeps and a voice at the other end answered.
“Hi Bridget, it’s me.”
THE END
Fandom: Murder Call
Characters: Tessa, Steve
Prompt: 001. Beginnings
Word Count: 1914(Mac Word)
Rating: PG
Summary: Coda to the novel "Deadline"/"Suspect" by Jennifer Rowe.
Author's Notes: The first story I wrote in direct reply to the 100-fic challenge. Also the first gen fic I wrote with Tessa and Steve (i.e. no romance).
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Jennifer Rowe, Hal McElroy and Southern Star. I make no profit out of this.
**
God, she wanted nothing more than crawl into bed and sleep for a week. Never in her life had she been so physically and mentally exhausted. If this was what she had signed up for, then... Then what? She had signed up for this. Pushed through the ranks, even, just to get the open spot when it became available. Waited for two years stuck in a suburb police station as a general duties detective, reading the ads every day and listening to the grapevine, simply waiting for the day she could get her chance.
It had taken four tries, however. Central Homicide was both an attraction and a curse, and you were either stuck with it or gave up within the first few months. If you managed to get past the first hellish months, you could never let it go. That’s what her father had told her once, as an explanation to her naive yet raging demand as to why he left in the middle of dinner again. You couldn’t get out once you were in over your head.
Gazing across the car at her week-old partner, Detective Senior Constable Tessa Vance let her tired mind wonder where his feelings on the matter were. Was he already stuck, or was he still able to get out? It struck her how little she actually knew about him. It hadn’t taken her this long to get to know her old partner.
Then again, you haven’t gotten off to an excellent start either, her mind reminded her wryly.
Tessa agreed silently, withdrawing and settling her eyes on the flashing lights passing by in colourful streaks. They were already in downtown Sydney, fifteen minutes into the departure from the seaside amusement park filled with horrible memories and old ghosts. Being late evening, the city was bustling with the night life so closely related to this part of town. Tessa watched the people on the sidewalks, a sense of melancholy falling over her.
Her partner was driving her home, back to a place that had recently been the epicentre of upheavals in her life. She wondered if it could still be her sanctuary, but now it all depended on whether things had been settled there or not. Were they coming back to flashing blue lights and curious neighbours? She had no idea. She had just gotten into the car, the adrenaline leaving her and replaced by the early stages of shock.
Head raging with the chaos of the past week, Tessa felt a shiver run up her spine and huddled into Steve’s jacket, the familiar smell of male calming her down. Apart from a building headache, she felt disgusting and in need of a hot shower. Her shirt was still sticky with orange juice and blood. Orange juice from a clumsy clerk. Blood from a knife held at her throat and making a nick when trying to escape.
A sudden onwash of fresh tears shocked her and Tessa quickly turned her head away lest Steve would see them running down her cheeks. She squeezed her eyes closed, making stars appear in the dull darkness as a sharp thrust ran through her heart.
She was not going to cry! Not here, not in front of him! His first impression of her was probably horrible enough without her adding to it. Tessa swallowed a rising sob, folding her arms around herself tightly beneath the suit jacket, and stared stoically out on the bustling city night life.
This is not the time. Pull yourself together. This is better kept behind doors.
A few minutes later, Tessa felt control slipping back to her and rejoiced silently until the car made a turn and headed down a familiar road. Just a few more blocks and she would be home.
Home.
Steve must have given it some thought as well, because as they made the last turn down Adamson Avenue, he spoke up for the first time since he had started up the car.
“You gonna be okay?”
It startled her out of her jumbled thoughts and emotions, nearly making her blurt out ‘no’ before grabbing a hold of herself. She was silent for a few moments, watching the looming building rise in front of the car and the lack of uniformed cars, finally replying once the car slipped into the parking lot. “Yeah.”
She couldn’t tell whether he believed her or not, nor understand why she would care about that, but she thought his lips twitched slightly as if to pursue further interrogation. However, he said nothing more, simply nodding and giving off a small smile. It suited him. More than the slightly annoyed look he had been wearing nearly all week.
Still, he sat and watched her as her hand froze on the handle, her chest constricting slightly at the sight of a building that had just hours before been occupied with a face from the past. A face she could have very well done without. But who didn't want to change the past or control the future? It was futile.
Another second ticked by and Tessa snapped out of if, wringing her arms loose from the tight tangle they had wrapped themselves in, starting to pull off the suit jacket and the calming scent. She froze when she spotted a dark splotch on the lapel.
“Oh no!” she exclaimed suddenly, “I got blood on your jacket!”
“It’s okay.”
“What? No! It’s not okay! I—I... Look, I’ll take it to the dry cleaners. You’ll get it back tomorrow, I swear.”
“It’s okay,” Steve said firmly, stopping her nervous ramble with a warm hand upon hers. It stopped her instantaneously. She looked at the hand as it brought back the same shot of warmth she had felt at the stake-out earlier. “I’ll take care of it,” Steve added, meeting her eyes. She swallowed, her heartbeat coming down from the sudden rush.
“Are you sure? I mean, it’s my fault—I should—“
“Tessa...” Steve started warningly and she paused again, shocked by the firmness in his voice. It reminded her how stubborn he could be. It also reminded her how stubborn she could be. And in the midst of that, she liked the way he spoke her name.
Her fingers relinquished the white-knuckled hold they had had on the jacket.
“Thank you,” Steve said, taking the jacket and holding it in his hands as he let out a small breath. He then met her eyes again. “Are you sure you’re going to be all right?”
“Yes,” Tessa replied immediately, a bit rushed, and he rose an eyebrow in doubt. “Yes, I’ll be fine,” she said again, a bit more convincing, plastering a smile on her face that hurt as it stretched sore throat muscles. She grimaced only briefly, already putting her hands on the seatbelt and unbuckling. “Thank you for the ride.”
She climbed out into the hot but fresh night air, her eyes tearing up by the breeze hitting her face, and closed the door. Seconds later, the other door opened and Steve’s voice sounded through the darkness.
“You don’t have to stay here tonight.” Tessa’s eyes widened as she turned to meet his above the roof of the car. “I mean, I’ve got a spare room if you...” He drifted off, obviously uncomfortable. However, it sent a warm sensation to her stomach and her smile was a little more real this time.
“Thank you,” she said honestly, “but I’ll be fine.” He gave her an uncertain look and she crumbled slightly. “Okay, maybe not exactly fine, but I’ll be all right. In the end,” she added in a mumble.
“Right,” Steve said finally. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then. You want me to pick you up?”
“That’d be nice,” Tessa smiled.
“Okay, I’ll drop by in the morning. Don’t forget the doctor’s orders.” His words were warm and amused, and Tessa chuckled lightly.
“I won’t. Thank you. I’ll...” She paused, stealing a glance at the looming three-story building. She let out a sigh. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Good night.”
“Night,” Steve replied as she walked away from the car towards the entrance. She heard the door slam and the engine fire up again, and then the car was reversing into the street and speeding off into the bustling Friday night.
Just like that. No more argument, no more obvious concern. Brett would have been relentless, at least until he got fed up and left her alone to go brood somewhere else. Tessa shook her head quickly, trying to get her thoughts off track. Brett was gone and her partner had nothing to do with him. He was just a guy in the right place at the wrong time. If things had been different... No, she couldn't afford to go down that road. It would not do her any good moaning for any male wandering by because she was simply lonely and desperate.
Tessa wiped off the stray tears that had somehow wound their way down her cheeks and went inside the large apartment building. Once she closed the apartment door behind her, the trashed living room glaring at her in the darkness, she was reminded yet again that he was gone and she was all alone. It took a very long moment before she reacted.
A piece of red police sealing tape was stuck in her hand from being ripped off the doorway; she slung it into the garbage bin along with a broken vase and some other items. Fixing the pillows and blankets on the couch, an overturned chair, tidying up the mess her past had created. Then she went to the house phone, plugging it back in. Seconds later she was calling the name on the card that had been left behind on the door frame. A detective Jack Simmons.
The detective wanted her to come in tomorrow for her statement. Initially, he wanted to talk to her tonight, as well as get some photograps taken of the injuries she had gotten, but she told him the photos had already been taken (courtesy of constable Dee Suzeraine) and he relented. The place had already been looked at by the forensics, so she was welcome to stay, though he did ask whether there was someplace else she could spend the night. His voice was calm, warm and reassuring, and Tessa felt her shoulders relax.
After hanging up, Tessa sent another look around the apartment. Even with the small clean-up she had just done, there was still marks of where the blood had been, and where the struggle had made tears in furniture. She could still smell him. The breath on her neck. The whisper into her ear, instructing her what lies to tell Steve, chuckling. The knife on her neck...
The phone was once more in her hands and she stared at it uncertainly, biting her lip. Two possibilities. One certain and the other uncertain. Both bringing security in some way. Either sensible or desperate, it was her choice.
She punched the numbers and waited for someone to pick it up. A few beeps and a voice at the other end answered.
“Hi Bridget, it’s me.”
THE END
Abonner på:
Innlegg (Atom)
